Five years ago, my heart shattered into a million tiny little pieces.
Since then, I've picked up the pieces and put them back where they belong. Almost every piece is there, although the cracks in between will be forever visible.
Carter, I still think of you often. The children will catch me off guard from time to time, by bringing up your name at random times. Luke, more than anyone, mentions the brother he has, that died in my tummy. They talk about you at dinner time. They talk about you when they are playing. I like knowing that they know you are here, even if you aren't here.
I think of you most often when I am running. I'm not sure why you come to me then, but you do. I wonder what you would look like now. Who you would be. What role you would play in our family. What your silly little quirks would be, that would always make laugh.
I love you my baby boy. To the moon and back.