Friday, December 21, 2012

It's The End Of The World, As We Know It...

...and I feel fine!


The world is supposed to end today. (Let's leave out the obvious facts that leap year wasn't figured into this, so technically the world should have ended some seven-ish months ago. Or that it is already past doomsday on the other side of the world.) So, for fun...let's play pretend.

Good-bye, cruel world! Good-bye, $30,000 in student loans that were going to forever haunt me! Good-bye, professor that gave me an A-, (even though I went into the final with a 96%) and never graded a single paper I wrote for the class! Good-bye, laundry that never ends and stubborn stains on uniform shirts. Good-bye, bills that come every. single. month. and dishes that multiply in the sink, while I sleep. Good-bye, tantrums, running out of milk, gas prices, ear infections at 2 am, and no 24 hour pharmacy within a 30 mile radius. Good-bye, dusty shelves, carpet stains, and grocery shopping. Good-bye, pissy people in long lines and hold music. Good-bye, guilty feelings for eating chocolate. And chips. And ice-cream. At 10 pm.

Good-bye, job! This means I don't have to work today, right? Boss? Right...?