Monday, November 5, 2012

Happy Birthday, My Precious Carter

Happy birthday, my baby boy. Today would be your 4th birthday. We would celebrate with your favorite cake and ice cream, surrounded by your family that loves you. We would hear you laugh in excitement at your presents and gladly accept your sticky thank-you kisses. We would tuck in you tonight and tell you to stop growing, because we don't want our baby boy to grow up so fast. You would giggle and promise to try.
Instead, I'll take a quiet moment to whisper my love to you. I will think of you, like I do often, and smile. You were my miracle baby that I didn't get to hold in my arms on earth, but I will forever hold in heart.
Your siblings were randomly talking about you last night, at Daddy's birthday dinner. It was funny that they would bring you up, because I don't think that they remember that today is your birthday. I sat back, not saying anything, listening to them processing it with their child-like innocence. It makes me happy to know that although I don't speak of you out loud often, they haven't forgotten you.
Happy birthday, my little one. Bounce on a cloud, dance on a star...and never forget how much I love you.
Love, Mommy

If you could see me'd see joy and laughter in my eyes
I'm swinging on a swing set in the sky...No you wouldn't cry
If you could see me now...every single tear would be erased
By the love that shines on Jesus' face...oh what a place

I never played with my brother and my sisters in the yard
I never was rocked to sleep in my mother's arms
But the arms that hold me are the same arms that made me
I know you miss me...I wish you could see your baby.

If you could see me now...
Even though you are looking through a broken heart
You wouldn't bring me back to where you are..
I'm dancing on a star

If you could see me now...
We're all eating cake and ice cream
Oops I got some chocolate on my wings
It's a party just for me.

Daddy will you read a bedtime story sometimes just for me
Mama I'll come and see you now and then in your dreams
So don't waste another moment worrying about what might've been
Jesus loves me and you know I'm with Him

If you could see me now I'd tell you
That you're up here way too soon
And God still has some things for you to do
And I'll see you when you're through

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