Monday, July 19, 2010

If Someone Would Have Told Me...

If someone would have told me, that one day, Josh and I would get married, I would have rolled my eyes and laughed.

If someone would have told me, that one day I would be the mother of five kids, I would have called them crazy.

If someone would have told me, the night that I went into labor with Bailey, that exactly nine years from that day, I would be having a hysterectomy, I wouldn't have believed them.

Nine years ago today, I was in labor with my first baby. I was scared and I didn't know what to expect. Much like the feelings that I'm having today.

I know that my family is complete and we hadn't planned on any more children anyway...but, to know that it is 100% final, is an overwhelming feeling. To know that the organ that held my growing babies is going to be gone, is kind of emotional. To know that a piece of me, a piece that was very important, is going to be removed, is strange.

From the time that I was much younger, I always said that I wanted all my children before I turned 30 years old. I don't know why that was my cut-off...it just always was. Now, I'm beginning to realize that there was a reason why I had that feeling. If I would have waited, it's possible that I wouldn't have had a chance to have these beautiful children, that I have.

I can't believe how quickly your life can change. To look back on all of the amazing, scary, sad, embarrassing, heart breaking, wonderful, angering, personal, special, crazy things that have happened in the last decade, is sobering. Life changes. It doesn't wait for you to be ready...it just does. I'm so thankful that everything has worked out the way that it has and today doesn't have to be harder than it is.

Well, we're off to the hospital. See y'all in a couple days. I'm going to try to convince my doc, one more time, that I deserve to have a tummy tuck, thrown in. ;)

2 comments:

Lacey Sue said...

You've been in our thoughts and prayers all day!! I love you...heal fast!

Amy said...

I know what you mean. Making it permanent is a huge step. I hope everything went well.