I know that I joke around on my blog a lot, about how crazy my kids make me. I won't lie...they really do drive me to the brink of insanity, now and then.
I have days when I wonder how I got here. I have days when I miss only being responsible for myself. I have days when I miss the quiet. I have days when I miss showering alone. I have days when I miss being able to go out, without first finding a babysitter, making sure dinner is figured out for them...and then cancelling because someone got sick. I have days when I miss putting something down and it would stay there. I have days when I miss going to bed when I want and getting up when I want. I have days when I miss having a conversation with Josh, without being interrupted nine times.
But...I can't do these things.
I made a choice, the second that I found out that I was pregnant, to become a mother. I made a choice to put that little baby, first.
No. Matter. What.
I made a choice that I would give up the lifestyle that I had, and live solely for this tiny person, that I created. I made a choice, that I would love my child(ren) unconditionally. I made a choice to live selflessly and do whatever I had to do, to provide for and raise my baby(ies) to be wonderful, caring, selfless, educated, kind people.
That's what being a "mother", means to me. Making a choice to forever put someone else, before myself.
Even on the days that they drive me to the brink of insanity.