Tuesday, May 25, 2010

If I Could Turn Back Time

I've been reflecting a lot on my life, lately. I've been through a lot in this short (ha!) life of mine. What if I could go back in time? Not to have a second chance at anything or change anything, but just to relive certain days...

-I'd like to go back to any of the numerous days that I walked next door to my Meme's house for lunch. She'd let me eat in the living room and I always felt so grown up. She'd spend hours upon hours playing Trouble or Uno with me and telling me stories about my mom, aunt and uncles, growing up.

-I'd like to go back to the first time I liked a boy and he liked me back. Such new feelings. Excitement. Nervousness. Curiosity.

-I'd like to go back to the night I found out that I made my high school's dance team. I ran out into the backyard and screamed so loud! I didn't think that I would ever in my life, be that happy again.

-I'd like to go back to the night of my first kiss. It was awkward and horrible (sorry, you know who, if you ever read this...), but it was an important milestone in a teenage girl's life.

-I'd like to go back to one of those crazy days that we skipped school and hung out at one of our friend's grandparent's house...watching cartoons and eating nachos. It was stupid and it was silly...but it was fun!

-I'd like to go back to some of the crazy conversations I had while working at McDonald's. I sure learned a lot from my adult superiors! ;)

-I'd like to go back to the night that Josh took me to Prom. I felt so beautiful and he looked so cute!

-I'd like to go back to the day that I moved out of my parent's house and into my college dorm. That first night, I sat on my bed and realized that my life was truly beginning.

-I'd like to go back to the day that I went to breakfast with my Mom and told her that I was pregnant. I was so nervous that I didn't eat a thing. I was pretty sure she was going to kill me. That's probably the day that she realized that I wasn't her little girl, anymore.

-I'd like to go back to the day that we brought Bailey home from the hospital. I placed her in her crib, sat down in the rocking chair and thought, "Now what?".

-I'd like to go back to the day that Josh and I flew back east and I got to introduce my 8 week old baby girl to my family that I hadn't seen in 8 years.

-I'd like to go back to the day that Ryleigh decided that crawling was for babies, so she stood up and ran across the room.

-I'd like to go back to the day that Avery was born, 5 weeks early, stunning the doctors at a whopping 7 lbs 3 oz. No one believed that my due date really was 5 weeks away.

-I'd like to go back to the night that we found out I was pregnant with Luke. We knew that very moment, the miracle that he was and why he was sent to us.

-I'd like to go back to the day that I realized I had lost 50 lbs. I was so darn proud of myself and all that I had accomplished.

-I'd like to go back to the day I got to give Presley her first bath. It was Thanksgiving 2008 and the NICU nurses felt bad that she wouldn't get to be home for it. So, they cleared out the room, not allowing any other mommies or babies in there, so that we could bathe our little preemie princess. I finally felt like her Mom and not a bystander, watching her getting taken care of.

-I'd like to go back to the day that I was told that I could file for graduation. I finally felt like all my hard work was beginning to pay off.

-I'd like to go back yesterday...because time is passing too quickly. I want to just hold on to a moment and really appreciate it...before it's gone.

3 comments:

Common Mom said...

Love it.

Mike and Jen said...

I love all your posts! They always get me thinking! And you have a way with words, lady!

Andrea said...

LOVED that post, Leeann. One of my favorites of all time!!