13 Things I Will Never Understand
1. Why is it so hard to put your socks in the laundry room? If I wanted them all over the house, I wouldn't get so mad when you leave them there.
2. What is so fascinating about watching a bunch of sweaty men run around with a ball? Basketball, soccer, football...I don't get it.
3. Why can you take apart an entire engine and rebuild it, but you can't master the art of "the ponytail"? Even our 4 year old mastered it a year ago!
4. Why does every trip to the bathroom require 15 minutes?
5. Why do you not understand that I do not wish to learn how to gut a fish? No matter how many times you offer to teach me....I'm gonna tell you no!
6. What is so funny about farting and burping?
7. Why do I take care of our kids and you baby-sit? (This is actually not my husband, but I have heard men say this.)
8. Why do you want to waste a perfectly good Saturday morning, walking around a grassy area, with golf clubs? Walk around our grassy area with a lawn mower instead. You know you'll just lie about your score anyway.
9. What is so difficult about understanding that black pants cannot be worn with brown shoes? Please stop laughing at me every time I try to explain it.
10. How do you zone out, so completely, when watching TV? An earthquake, a child painting themselves with my make-up or a child writing on the walls...goes completely unnoticed when ESPN is on.
11. Why does a "good" movie have to involve guns, steroid-looking men and some one's nose bleeding?
12. Why don't you understand that moving furniture around, is therapeutic for me? Even more so, if you are around to do the lifting!
13. What is so fascinating about boobs? Honestly, I have some...and they're not all that special.