Friday, October 5, 2007

WOOH-Work Out Of House...WAH-Work At Home

WOOH-I have to please one boss.
WAH-I have to please one boss. And the four little bosses that I gave birth to. At the same time.

WOOH- I get to clock out for lunch.
WAH- I hold lunch in one hand and my laptop in the other. I chew with my mouth open while yelling, "Get OFF the table!" and "Stop hitting each other!"

WOOH- I excuse myself to use the restroom.
WAH- I go "potty"... with an audience.

WOOH-When someone pisses me off, I can gossip about them and call them a bitch behind their back.
WAH-When someone makes Mommy angry, she has to send them to their room. Then they like Daddy better.

WOOH-Sometimes it's nice to just let Daddy handle the home stuff for a while.
WAH-I handle the home stuff and the work stuff. Simultaneously. This is why my daughter has gone to school with my work papers and I have filed her homework under "High Value Homes." Whoops.

WOOH-People look at me with respect. They value my opinion.
WAH-People stare at my sweatpants, puke-stained t-shirt and messy hair. They value me going away.

WOOH-I have peers to discuss my problems with.
WAH-Talking to my children about the fight Daddy and I had would be wrong. I have to pay for therapy. :) LOL

WOOH-I have to call in and explain to my boss (who has no children) that my child has an ear infection (for the 3rd time in 2 months) and I won't be in.
WAH-I take care of my sick baby and work when I can.

WOOH-I have to miss the Halloween program at my daughter's pre-school.
WAH-I never have to choose between getting fired and missing my daughter sing.

WOOH-I got a nice paycheck and a good benefits package.
WAH-I get a measly paycheck, no benefits package, cuddle time, kisses all day, time to color, walks to the park, no guilt when someone is sick, more time to exercise, to attend all recitals and programs and the joy of knowing that I will never miss a thing in my children's lives.


Pam said...

Boy did you hit the nail on the head with this one! I know I get "adult" time (is it really adult time when I spend my days with 20 2nd graders???) and a lunch "break" (is it really a break when I shovel my food in so I can call parents, check email, grade papers, etc so that I don't have as much to bring home), but I also am made to feel guilty when I have to take off for sick kids and I will miss all my daugher's and son's school programs, field trips, etc. Your days are crazy, but you get the best paycheck of all...time with your kids. Your so lucky!! (although, I know in the middle of the doesn't always feel like lucky!) too bad I can't teach for a cyber school and do my work from home in my pj's- that would rock! Enjoy your weekend!!

Sniz said...

People value me going away. Woohoo. I am still laughing. OH MY GOSH, this is brilliant. Awesome post! You should submit it for publication!